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| Divas of Doom - "900,234... 900,235...900,236..." |
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| Everyone: "Really?! We really have to do this? At least there are two Sin Caras to assault." |
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| "No one can cage my destiny! ... or my scarf." |
Showing posts with label sin cara. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sin cara. Show all posts
Friday, October 14, 2011
What They Were Really Thinking: 9/26/2011
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Fantasy Update: Brands!? We don’t need no stinking brands!
At the beginning of Raw this past Monday, Mr. H’s announced that the brand split will be over indefinitely. MADNESS! This changes everything I thought I knew about the world. Black is white! Up is down! Dogs and cats living together! MASS HYSTERIA! How will I live in a world where I have to see John Cena “wrestle” twice a week?
Props:
1) Randy Orton: Taking advantage of the opportunity to wrestle on both shows this week, RKO beat Dolph Ziggler and Christian on his way to a cool 79 points for the week. The only downside is that the World’s Strongest Man beat the crap out of him after the Christian match. If I were Orton, I would make sure to wear some thick shin pads because Mark Henry is hungry forpizza the belt.
2) Sin Cara: With victories over Jack “Gosh, Vickie Guerrero sure is pretty” Swagger and Daniel “Image not provided” Bryan, Sin Cara is behind only Orton and Cena in points for the week. Most surprising of all is the apparent heel turn at the end of the Bryan match. He’s primed to be the greatest mute heel since Helen Keller.
Slops:
1) The WWE for burying our favorite mid-carders: R-Truth, John Morrison, Cody Rhodes and The Miz had a pretty light presence on both shows. Apparently the brand merge means more John Cena thinking he’s funny (at the 4:10 mark) and extended trailers for Triple H’s new movie. No one cares about your new movie, H’s! Now, if the movie were about buddy cops taking down a government conspiracy starring The Miz and R-Truth titled “Dis-Miz-al of Truth”, then I’d be interested.
2) Our so-called smack talk board: Only three people from the league have even commented so far. Here are the “highlights”.
Best Uso brothers joke (Mapes): What did the one Uso say to the other Uso?
I’ve never heard of U-so leave me alone.
Best rebuttal (Moose): Your current point accumulation is a clear indication of how credible your assessments of worth are.
Best Cena related burn (The Miche): John Cena sucks for all time.
Standings
Check out our league's smack talk here.
Props:
1) Randy Orton: Taking advantage of the opportunity to wrestle on both shows this week, RKO beat Dolph Ziggler and Christian on his way to a cool 79 points for the week. The only downside is that the World’s Strongest Man beat the crap out of him after the Christian match. If I were Orton, I would make sure to wear some thick shin pads because Mark Henry is hungry for
2) Sin Cara: With victories over Jack “Gosh, Vickie Guerrero sure is pretty” Swagger and Daniel “Image not provided” Bryan, Sin Cara is behind only Orton and Cena in points for the week. Most surprising of all is the apparent heel turn at the end of the Bryan match. He’s primed to be the greatest mute heel since Helen Keller.
Slops:
1) The WWE for burying our favorite mid-carders: R-Truth, John Morrison, Cody Rhodes and The Miz had a pretty light presence on both shows. Apparently the brand merge means more John Cena thinking he’s funny (at the 4:10 mark) and extended trailers for Triple H’s new movie. No one cares about your new movie, H’s! Now, if the movie were about buddy cops taking down a government conspiracy starring The Miz and R-Truth titled “Dis-Miz-al of Truth”, then I’d be interested.
2) Our so-called smack talk board: Only three people from the league have even commented so far. Here are the “highlights”.
Best Uso brothers joke (Mapes): What did the one Uso say to the other Uso?
I’ve never heard of U-so leave me alone.
Best rebuttal (Moose): Your current point accumulation is a clear indication of how credible your assessments of worth are.
Best Cena related burn (The Miche): John Cena sucks for all time.
Standings
Check out our league's smack talk here.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Reason #95 Why Nobody Watches SmackDown: Scheduling
This show is called Friday Night SmackDown, yes? Friday Night SmackDown? I mean, half the time this crap isn't even on Friday! My DVR is all messed up. What gives?
The ads for this so-called Super SmackDown suggested that we would see the likes of The Miz (false), John Morrison (false) and Alberto Del Rio (false). Matches for CM Punk vs. Great Khali and Alberto Del Rio vs. Sin Cara were promised. Instead, we got boring Daniel Bryan against No Face and The Great Pale Douchebag against Khali. Not to mention, the second night in a row of John Cena pontification. Gross.
Damn it! These jokers just tricked us into watching SmackDown! WHY WHY WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO US!?
The ads for this so-called Super SmackDown suggested that we would see the likes of The Miz (false), John Morrison (false) and Alberto Del Rio (false). Matches for CM Punk vs. Great Khali and Alberto Del Rio vs. Sin Cara were promised. Instead, we got boring Daniel Bryan against No Face and The Great Pale Douchebag against Khali. Not to mention, the second night in a row of John Cena pontification. Gross.
Damn it! These jokers just tricked us into watching SmackDown! WHY WHY WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO US!?
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Raw Recap: 8/29/11
It's tough to pull away from "The Bachelor Pad", but we are watching Raw live tonight, no DVR. I do it all for my fans.
Opening promo:
Mr. H's starts off tonight to announce tonight's Super Raw (Yay! SmackDown stars! I hope Jinder Mahal is here!) and address Kevin Nash's fake car accident last week. He is quickly joined by CM Punk, wearing Jeff Hardy's boots, and Nash. It got started a little slow with Nash and Mr. H's working out their problems. Thankfully, we've got CM Punk in the ring, who pretty much said my thoughts exactly when he called Nash gimpy and boring. If it was me, I would have said something along the lines of him looking like he's trying out for a "Just for Men" commercial. Punk then sets his sights on Mr. H's, who he berates until he gives us a Nash vs. CM Punk match for NOC.
I can't see Nash being able to wrestle a match up to the standards CM Punk has set for his matches, so I think something will be up with that match. My guess is that is where Mr. H's finally gives us the heel turn. He is really starting to look like a bitch lately next to Punk, so it's about time he gets one over on him.
Dolph Ziggler vs. Randy Orton
Ziggler gets off to a hot start, likely due to the Cougar necklace that his manager is wearing. Orton turns it around and actually lands a Superplex(!) on Dolph. We go back and forth a little more, until Dolph gives Randy a little Sweet Chin Music.
The match finally ends with Randy reversing a sleeper hold into a modified powerbomb followed by a RKO. That was actually a really good match. It's good to see that the stink of SmackDown hasn't affected Randy yet. Props to Dolph too. I'm actually intrigued by this Vickie Guerrero/Swagger/Ziggler storyline right now.
John Cena promo:
It's been about 40 minutes and they haven't even mentioned Cena. Thankfully, he's out next. John tells us that we should be here right now. Luckily, he's coming to Columbus next week! Has anybody ever listened to the words of Cena's entrance? Tonight's introduction ends with my favorite line of the song: "I'll brush your mouth like Colgate." That's why I love Cena. He can talk smack using personal hygiene.
Wow, Cena gets beeped and says anus in the span of two sentences. A couple of second grade teachers are going to have a rough day tomorrow. Unfortunately, Mark Henry comes out and talks about some SmackDown stuff. The fans make it even worse with the stupid "WHAT?" chant. Not sure if I am the only one on the RiR staff who feels this way, but I hate that bit. A lot of great heel promos get ruined with that stuff. Anyway, other people come out and it looks like we will get Cena and Sheamus vs. Christian and Mark Henry.
Meanwhile, backstage
We cut to John Laurinaitis who ends up getting confronted by Mr. H's. The real wild card in this whole storyline is this what Lauranitis has to do with all of this. He's mostly been in the background, but they've been mentioning him a lot more on this episode. Feels like he going to play a prominent role before it's all said and done.
The Miz vs. CM Punk
Punk's boots look a lot better with his trunks then his t-shirt, by the way. The early highlight is when Lawler tells a geography joke. Miz is mostly controlling the match until Punk gets a few moves in. To be honest, the announcers have kind of ruined this match for us, as King and Cole won't shut up. Guys, we are over you. Luckily, action picks up as R-Truth interferes and gets Miz DQ'd. Punk fends them off until Nash comes out to distract him and the beat down starts. My beef with this is why would Miz and Truth, who are complaining about conspiracies, let Nash take all the spotlight? If I were them, I'd kick Nash's ass. That will get you some attention.
Sin Cara vs. Jack Swagger
Sin Cara wins with a lionsault when Dolph distracts Swagger because he is jealous of the whole Guerrero/Swagger thing going on. I have a little less faith in this whole angle now that someone in it lost to Sin Cara. Forget what I said earlier.
Kofi Kingston and Evan Bourne vs. David Otunga and Michael McGuillicutty
It's a rematch for the Tag Titles, probably because David Otunga used that rematch clause that his agent was so savvy to include. We learn that the new Bourne/Kingston tag team will be called Air Boom, as suggested by a WWE fan. Darn it, I really thought they might like my submission of Air Bore, amirite?. Anyway, unsurprisingly Bourne and Kofi take it.
Kelly Kelly vs. Brie Bella
The Bella twins pull the old switcharoo once again for the victory. I will be curious to see how they score that match. Brie was the legal winner, but Nikki won the match. The life of a WWE statistician is one I do not envy.
Commercial Break
As a big fan of WWE films (I went to the theatre all four days that "12 Rounds" was out), I was excited to see the trailer for their new movie "Laundromat Knights". It surprises me that they are going to try a romantic comedy with all the success they have had in action films, but this one looks like a winner. For those who didn't see the trailer, it stars Evan Bourne as a successful investment banker who falls for the local, lowly laundromat girl played by Mandy Moore. It also stars Jason Biggs as Evan's down-to-earth friend and Vladimir Koslov as the evil laundromat owner. Looking forward to that one!
John Cena and Sheamus vs. Mark Henry and Christian
The subplot of this match is that Henry gets the winner tomorrow between Orton and Christian at NOC, so maybe a double-cross is in the books. Heels get the early advantage, until Sheamus gets the hot tag to Cena who cleans house. Faces end up winning the match with the combination of a Brogue Kick and FU on Christian. Wouldn't hold my breath tomorrow for a win if I was Christian fan after that.
Ending promo:
We think that Raw ends, but they cut back to Mr. H's in the dressing room who is approached by Punk. Mr. H's lets Punk know that his match with Nash has been canceled. After Punk berates him a little more, Mr. H's informs him that he still will have a match at NOC, only against Mr. H's himself.
This confirms my earlier premonition, as there was no way Nash could wrestle a whole match. They did a good job of bypassing the Nash match without making him look weak. Overall, the set up has been pretty intriguing so far. A Punk vs. Mr. H's match has been teased recently with Punk calling him a doofus during his now famous rant, and showing up a comic-com. I think the WWE has done a great job of taking the story to its likely ending point while keeping a couple of wild cards. It will be interesting to see what Nash has to say about this next week, as well as what role, if any, he plays in their match.
Superlatives
Who got got?
John Laurinaitis gets told what's what by Trips.
Most predictable moment
A tie between The Miz and Dolph Ziggler losing. You had to know who would win as soon as those matches were announced, right?
Most awkward moment
Natalya and Beth Phoenix rant backstage about how they're not jealous of Kelly Kelly. But they're totally jealous of Kelly Kelly.
Opening promo:
Mr. H's starts off tonight to announce tonight's Super Raw (Yay! SmackDown stars! I hope Jinder Mahal is here!) and address Kevin Nash's fake car accident last week. He is quickly joined by CM Punk, wearing Jeff Hardy's boots, and Nash. It got started a little slow with Nash and Mr. H's working out their problems. Thankfully, we've got CM Punk in the ring, who pretty much said my thoughts exactly when he called Nash gimpy and boring. If it was me, I would have said something along the lines of him looking like he's trying out for a "Just for Men" commercial. Punk then sets his sights on Mr. H's, who he berates until he gives us a Nash vs. CM Punk match for NOC.
I can't see Nash being able to wrestle a match up to the standards CM Punk has set for his matches, so I think something will be up with that match. My guess is that is where Mr. H's finally gives us the heel turn. He is really starting to look like a bitch lately next to Punk, so it's about time he gets one over on him.
Dolph Ziggler vs. Randy Orton
Ziggler gets off to a hot start, likely due to the Cougar necklace that his manager is wearing. Orton turns it around and actually lands a Superplex(!) on Dolph. We go back and forth a little more, until Dolph gives Randy a little Sweet Chin Music.
The match finally ends with Randy reversing a sleeper hold into a modified powerbomb followed by a RKO. That was actually a really good match. It's good to see that the stink of SmackDown hasn't affected Randy yet. Props to Dolph too. I'm actually intrigued by this Vickie Guerrero/Swagger/Ziggler storyline right now.
John Cena promo:
It's been about 40 minutes and they haven't even mentioned Cena. Thankfully, he's out next. John tells us that we should be here right now. Luckily, he's coming to Columbus next week! Has anybody ever listened to the words of Cena's entrance? Tonight's introduction ends with my favorite line of the song: "I'll brush your mouth like Colgate." That's why I love Cena. He can talk smack using personal hygiene.
Wow, Cena gets beeped and says anus in the span of two sentences. A couple of second grade teachers are going to have a rough day tomorrow. Unfortunately, Mark Henry comes out and talks about some SmackDown stuff. The fans make it even worse with the stupid "WHAT?" chant. Not sure if I am the only one on the RiR staff who feels this way, but I hate that bit. A lot of great heel promos get ruined with that stuff. Anyway, other people come out and it looks like we will get Cena and Sheamus vs. Christian and Mark Henry.
Meanwhile, backstage
We cut to John Laurinaitis who ends up getting confronted by Mr. H's. The real wild card in this whole storyline is this what Lauranitis has to do with all of this. He's mostly been in the background, but they've been mentioning him a lot more on this episode. Feels like he going to play a prominent role before it's all said and done.
The Miz vs. CM Punk
Punk's boots look a lot better with his trunks then his t-shirt, by the way. The early highlight is when Lawler tells a geography joke. Miz is mostly controlling the match until Punk gets a few moves in. To be honest, the announcers have kind of ruined this match for us, as King and Cole won't shut up. Guys, we are over you. Luckily, action picks up as R-Truth interferes and gets Miz DQ'd. Punk fends them off until Nash comes out to distract him and the beat down starts. My beef with this is why would Miz and Truth, who are complaining about conspiracies, let Nash take all the spotlight? If I were them, I'd kick Nash's ass. That will get you some attention.
Sin Cara vs. Jack Swagger
Sin Cara wins with a lionsault when Dolph distracts Swagger because he is jealous of the whole Guerrero/Swagger thing going on. I have a little less faith in this whole angle now that someone in it lost to Sin Cara. Forget what I said earlier.
Kofi Kingston and Evan Bourne vs. David Otunga and Michael McGuillicutty
It's a rematch for the Tag Titles, probably because David Otunga used that rematch clause that his agent was so savvy to include. We learn that the new Bourne/Kingston tag team will be called Air Boom, as suggested by a WWE fan. Darn it, I really thought they might like my submission of Air Bore, amirite?. Anyway, unsurprisingly Bourne and Kofi take it.
Kelly Kelly vs. Brie Bella
The Bella twins pull the old switcharoo once again for the victory. I will be curious to see how they score that match. Brie was the legal winner, but Nikki won the match. The life of a WWE statistician is one I do not envy.
Commercial Break
As a big fan of WWE films (I went to the theatre all four days that "12 Rounds" was out), I was excited to see the trailer for their new movie "Laundromat Knights". It surprises me that they are going to try a romantic comedy with all the success they have had in action films, but this one looks like a winner. For those who didn't see the trailer, it stars Evan Bourne as a successful investment banker who falls for the local, lowly laundromat girl played by Mandy Moore. It also stars Jason Biggs as Evan's down-to-earth friend and Vladimir Koslov as the evil laundromat owner. Looking forward to that one!
John Cena and Sheamus vs. Mark Henry and Christian
The subplot of this match is that Henry gets the winner tomorrow between Orton and Christian at NOC, so maybe a double-cross is in the books. Heels get the early advantage, until Sheamus gets the hot tag to Cena who cleans house. Faces end up winning the match with the combination of a Brogue Kick and FU on Christian. Wouldn't hold my breath tomorrow for a win if I was Christian fan after that.
Ending promo:
We think that Raw ends, but they cut back to Mr. H's in the dressing room who is approached by Punk. Mr. H's lets Punk know that his match with Nash has been canceled. After Punk berates him a little more, Mr. H's informs him that he still will have a match at NOC, only against Mr. H's himself.
This confirms my earlier premonition, as there was no way Nash could wrestle a whole match. They did a good job of bypassing the Nash match without making him look weak. Overall, the set up has been pretty intriguing so far. A Punk vs. Mr. H's match has been teased recently with Punk calling him a doofus during his now famous rant, and showing up a comic-com. I think the WWE has done a great job of taking the story to its likely ending point while keeping a couple of wild cards. It will be interesting to see what Nash has to say about this next week, as well as what role, if any, he plays in their match.
Superlatives
Who got got?
John Laurinaitis gets told what's what by Trips.
Most predictable moment
A tie between The Miz and Dolph Ziggler losing. You had to know who would win as soon as those matches were announced, right?
Most awkward moment
Natalya and Beth Phoenix rant backstage about how they're not jealous of Kelly Kelly. But they're totally jealous of Kelly Kelly.
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Rey Mysterio injured at Raw *UPDATED*
Rey Mysterio has injured his knee. Again. Look, the dude is getting old, OK? Fans in attendance at Raw on 8/15 have reported that during commercial break Rey was limping about while Del Rio worked the crowd. He apparently decided to go on with the match, probably because his heart is just so big, you know?
After the fade to black, Punk enters to help distract fans from Mysterio getting medical attention for the knee. Punk and Cena, among other things, play an elaborate game of pickle in the middle over the belt with Ricardo Rodriguez.
An MRI on Rey's knee has revealed that the little guy will not need surgery, though he will need months of rehab and will miss ring time. No word yet on how this affects the WWE's tour of Mexico in October. Though, they've got two Sin Caras so they're gold either way, right?
UPDATE
Rey took to twitter today to announce that he will be needing surgery, after all. He may miss ring action for several months. The surgery is scheduled for Friday, August 26th.
Source: F4W
After the fade to black, Punk enters to help distract fans from Mysterio getting medical attention for the knee. Punk and Cena, among other things, play an elaborate game of pickle in the middle over the belt with Ricardo Rodriguez.
An MRI on Rey's knee has revealed that the little guy will not need surgery, though he will need months of rehab and will miss ring time. No word yet on how this affects the WWE's tour of Mexico in October. Though, they've got two Sin Caras so they're gold either way, right?
UPDATE
Rey took to twitter today to announce that he will be needing surgery, after all. He may miss ring action for several months. The surgery is scheduled for Friday, August 26th.
Source: F4W
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