Fantasy Update: The Bourne Supremacy

It's been a big week in fantasy land: Alberto Del Rio is wrestling everyone, Mark Henry scored more than sixty points in a non-title match and Evan Bourne is shockingly relevant. Let's jump right in with the Slops and Props.

Props:

1) Evan Bourne: Really? Really?? REALLY!? The little engine that could is a part of the new tag team duo that I have dubbed Trix. (Silly smarks, Trix are for kids!) Trix's recent ascension to the Tag Team Championship has lead to serious points for Bourne, who not only scored 30 points for winning the belt, but also nabbed a cool 40 for getting the pin in both of their matches. He's outscored everyone but Del Rio and Henry and is the sole reason that Moose's team is in second place.

2) Alberto Del Rio: He's the WWE Champion, he's got 10,000 automobiles and he goes on SmackDown so the other MITB winner can job for him. Hell, his personal ring announcer has scored more points than Randy Orton. ADR es en fuego.

3) John Triton drops Zack Ryder for Ricardo Rodriguez: John Triton knows a good thing when he sees it and he knows that Ric-Rod is going to be racking up the mic points. He also knows that WWE Superstar and walking AXE body spray advertisement Zack Ryder isn't going over anytime soon. At least Ryder can rest easy knowing he has the highest ratio of crowd signs to matches won in the WWE Universe.

Slops:

1) Mark Henry: I know he scored a bunch of points during the Battle Royal, but he spent half the match outside the ring. I could make some terribly crude remarks about having to sit out half the match because he's so fat. I could say that "Weird Al" Yankovic wrote the song "Fat" about him, or that when he sits around the house he indeed sits around the outside of his house. But the fine readers of RiR are too classy for that brand of humor, so we'll just leave that stone unturned.

2) Rey Mysterio: In case you were unaware, Mr. 619 is going to be out for a few months after having surgery on his knee. This news comes as a serious blow to fantasy owners and nine-year-old kids everywhere. As an Alberto Del Rio owner, I'm saddened that he will not be jobbing for the champ anytime soon.

3) John Cena, Randy Orton, CM Punk, Christian: These fellas might not be aware, but combined they've been outscored by Evan Bourne. REALLY!?!?

Standings




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